The Mighty Cheekbones that would Rule the World

You speak wise words Lady C, for did you not see Johnny use his magnificent bone structure to bring other lesser mortals to their knees? Did he not with one strut emasculate one man and with a profile turn wanton a mere slip of a woman? Such is the mighy Depp's power that all in close proximity should fall by the wayside.

The only one who held anything beside him was the voodoo woman. With her bad teeth and raw and animal charms, she turned the Lord D to butter. Even pretty Lady J said, "If anyone should get together it should be those two."

But who can image that explosive couple taking turns washing dishes and eating Sunday roasts at the inlaws? But Lady J speaketh with the innocence and unbridled lust of youth, that see nothing but the immediate present; while I speak of boring longetivity and domestic futures.

My only pirate complaint is how they messed about with Jack's character, trying to lessen the smouldering or make it more Disney friendly. As if one could contain such radiance! Even the amazing Lady Curie would fall short against the Depp.